Community

It occurred to me the other day that Stef and I are both guilty of something that I dare say most of the American church is guilty of as well.  We much prefer the idea of community to actual community.

Allow me to expound on this idea, if you will.  Our little church community here is awesome.  The main difference of course is that it’s in Spanish.  Another huge difference is the length of it.  Church normally goes for at least 3 hours, sometimes as many as 5.  Additionally, prayer meeting is about the same time length, maybe 2.5 hours or more for starters.

Now most people, ourselves included, would think that’s outrageously long for church.  What I’ve come to realize though, is that we’re the problem in this scenario.  We come from a culture that largely emphasizes the individual over the community.

I once heard Francis Chan say he visited some part of Asia and was asked what church in America looked like.  When he responded church in America usually meant 1 hour on Sunday and 1 hour during the week for small group, the believers there just laughed.  They asked him how people could read the New Testament and think 2 hours a week was sufficient to build community.

Many moons ago, I lived in community a couple times during the summer on different mission trips.  As in, living with people on mission in the same place.  

Now, I realize that’s obviously not practical if you have a family, but there has to be something more than 2-3 hours a week, right?  Especially if you consider the hour on Sunday usually consists of roughly 2 minutes of meet and greet when people are actually talking to one another.

So, I’ve come to the conclusion that Steffani and I as well as most others I know simply like the idea of community over actual community.  Real, actual community by necessity takes a lot of time to cultivate.  More time than we want to give to it.

I’m learning little by little to appreciate community here.  I adore the people in our church, each one for different reasons.  And I’m trying to get over my desire for individual autonomy in exchange for something better...community.

Storytelling

Fair warning, this is a long one. I wrote it a couple weeks ago. I enjoyed writing it and hope you enjoy reading it. Hopefully someone can benefit from this.

This week, I’ve been diving in head first into a new book that is the best book I’ve read in quite some time.  The title is Barking up the Wrong Tree and it looks at different facets of what it takes to be successful.  There are so many nuggets I’m getting from it but I’m going to try to narrow it down for just a couple of blogs.

The first nugget and most important for me to try and implement is in regards to storytelling.  More specifically, what are the stories you’re telling yourself.  How do you interpret yourself in the world?  What is it shaped by?  Are you normally optimistic or pessimistic or somewhere inbetween?

As I was talking this over with my beautiful wife (she gets to hear all the external processing one could ever possibly hope for from her husband :) ) I was thinking about what’s the story I tell myself about who I am.

Over the years, one story has emerged that’s basically an overarching theme that changes from one context to the next, but the base stays the same.  At its core, it’s incredibly unhealthy and certainly stunts my progress in life.  Even more important is that it’s in complete opposition to what God Himself says about me.

The one, overarching story that I’ve told myself for as far back as I can remember is that I’m not ‘enough.’  I’m not good enough at ____ fill in the blank.  Or I’m not good enough for _____.  

There have been countless expressions of this story throughout my life, too many to count.  Stef asked me how I wasn’t good enough, compared to what exactly?  I answered it’s always been according to my own standards.  As such, I will never be enough according to my own standards.

After reading that, I’ve decided it’s time to start telling myself a better story.  This could easily lead to the opposite problem where one thinks they’re more than enough and people should be honored to be in the same room with them.  Obviously that’s not any better of a story.

Here’s the story I’m choosing to tell myself.  It won’t be easy after so many years of telling myself another story.  It is possible though, and that’s enough for me to get started.

My story is wrapped up in my Creator’s story.  God created the world, and then sent His own Son to save it.  And this Jesus that I worship is coming back one day.  Until then, we as the Church (capital C as preachers like to say) are to align ourselves to His mission of bringing people to His Son.

We are not responsible for people turning their hearts to Christ.  We are responsible for living out the gospel in word and deed.  Someone once famously said (or perhaps was misquoted as is often the case) to live the gospel, and use words if necessary.  I don’t see how that jives with the gospel itself though.

When Christ ascended, He didn’t tell His disciples to go out into all the world and tell people about me, but don’t use words.  What?

My story is simply to create good in this world and point others to Christ along the way.  He has given each of us incredible gifts and talents that are to be used to bring glory and honor to Him.  

Do you know how freeing that is?  That the whole point of one’s existence is not themselves or some -ism?  Conservatism, progressivism, capitalism, communism, socialism, etc.  Those aren’t the point.  

Christ is central to the universe and everything revolves around Him whether we acknowledge it or not.  My background is about as American as it gets.  We live in an incredibly individualistic culture that places a high value on the self.

Choosing a different story therefore is all the more difficult in a sense.  If you’re told by marketers your whole life that something will make your life better and motivational speakers tell you that you need to pursue your passions and even Christians encourage one another to find your calling (myself included btw), how does one reprogram their mind?

I’m not sure yet but I look forward to exploring the possibilities.  My guess is that it starts with focusing on things Scripture implores us to.  

Philippians 4:8 tells us to think about whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent or praiseworthy.  Seems like as good a place as any to start, doesn’t it?