Yesterday, I decided to declare a 'Buy Nothing Day' for myself. I had read about it and usually it takes place the day after Thanksgiving, but you can of course do it any day you want to. It was pretty interesting and made me think a little more deeply about consumerism and how our society is based on it. There were several times throughout the day where I thought, 'I need to go get this or that.' Since I had declared a 'Buy Nothing Day' I decided to wait on those purchases. What really stuck out to me was just how much buying is a part of our everyday lives.
When I was watching TV, it struck me as odd that all our advertising, the sole reason for it, is to sell stuff. Now yes, you do occasionally get the random commercial that is a health warning against smoking or something similar to that, but more often than not it's just people trying to sell you something. People have careers in advertising after getting a degree in advertising in university. And all to simply manipulate people into thinking their lives would be that much better if they just had this or that product, whether it be the latest whitening toothpaste or the latest and greatest car. What they neglect to mention is that the brand new car loses several thousand dollars in value once you drive it off the lot. Or the fact that if you took a car payment and invested in mutual funds for your adult working life, you'd be a millionaire by the end of it. Pretty wild, isn't it? Then again, what's really the purpose of being a millionaire? So you can simply buy more stuff? To give you a false sense of security? So you can live the American dream of being a true individual and not needing anyone else? How miserable life must be for the rich. You have all this money and all these toys and no one to share them with.
No matter how well you manage money, it can disappear at the drop of a hat if you have a medical crisis or something similar. I wonder how many bankruptcies are due to medical bills? A missionary friend once told me that our only true security is in Christ. That has stuck with me to this day. It makes everything else so much clearer, doesn't it? At the time he said it, I was telling him why I didn't want to join the mission field for 3 years, because I had job security. It was a good reminder at the time, because even though in education you have better job security than most other places, you can still ultimately lose your job and then you really realize how your only true security is in Christ. Being bipolar makes me realize this more than most I think. Everything is constantly changing in our lives, and the one constant is Jesus. He's the one place where we can put our security. Our possessions may get stolen, we may lose our jobs, we may get burned at the stake for our faith, but nothing can take away our security in Christ. To live is Christ and to die is gain, as the apostle Paul says.
Back to the original thought in this blog, buying. There is no limit to the amount of stuff we can buy if we have the money. But will all of that ultimately make us happier? I'm well aware that there are physiological changes that can occur when we make purchases, but the novelty of items quickly wears off. Perfect example was this past month I bought an iPhone because I had lost my old phone. I was on that thing constantly at first, always downloading and playing with new apps. It's a cool toy to have. Ultimately though, the novelty of the thing wears off and we're left to face our true selves. When you're stripped of all your possessions, what are you left with? Job had this very thing happen to him in the Old Testament. In addition to losing all his possessions, he lost his sons and daughters as well. In spite of all this, he was left hanging onto his faith in God. So when you're stripped of everything externally, what's left? Do you know what's beneath all the things that we clutter our lives with so we don't have to truly deal with our problems? So we can just continue to distract ourselves from pain and hurt and conflict. What's beneath all of it?
The last couple of days, inspired by the 'Buy Nothing Day,' I've been wondering if perhaps there's a better way to live. A lot of people are convinced that capitalism is the answer, but capitalism taken to it's lengths results in a consumeristic culture like we have in the states. Is that really a better way to live? Do we truly have better lives than those in 3rd world countries? I would argue our lives are just as broken as anyone else's, we just have an easier time of covering it up.
We have made stunning strides in technology and services, but does it really leave us better off? Does endless growth result in the betterment of a society as a whole or is it more concentrated at the top? The gap between the CEO's pay and the lowest man on the totem pole has increased exponentially in the past 20 years or so. Why? Does the CEO feel he is that much more vital to a corporation than his employees? Is there not a more equitable way to distribute the income? Why is wealth so concentrated at the top? This can be viewed from a couple different perspectives. One is that wealth is concentrated at the top of our own society, let's say people who make more than $250,000; which according to Fox news anchors isn't rich (but yet a teacher making $50,000 is rich?) There is an unbelievable amount of money at the top. Taken from another perspective, wealth is concentrated among the top billion people at an extreme rate. How many hundreds of millions of people live on less than $1 a day? On less than $2 a day? But then again, who lives a more fulfilling life? A person consumed by his possessions or someone who doesn't have any possessions and is therefore free from a lot of concern?
Money isn't the root of all evil. If you look at that scripture, it says the LOVE of money is the root of all KINDS of evil. Money isn't a bad thing in itself. You can do a lot of good with money. The problem is when it's not viewed as ultimately God's anyways and that we're simply stewards of it. That's a pretty radical concept, isn't it? You don't truly own anything, God owns it all. Your name may be on the title of something, but guess whose Name is on your title? Might be something to consider.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
mealtime, part 2
I've been doing some more thinking about mealtimes, and as I reflect I've reminded of how grateful I should be for the upbringing I had regarding this aspect of everyday life. When I was growing up, we had dinner every night around the dinner table with the TV off. While there were those inevitable times of fighting that happened between my brother and I, for the most part we always enjoyed one another's company.
When I helped my current pastor with his youth ministry at another church, one thing that always struck me as tragic was that the thing the kids loved the most was when we did big meals together. Now, it wasn't tragic that they loved the meals together, it was the reason behind it. Almost all of them said they rarely ate meals as a family, usually this was reserved for Thanksgiving and Christmas if that. That really stuck out to me, as I had always thought that's just what you do for dinner, you sit down as a family and enjoy one another's company. But apparently, this is practiced less and less often as time progresses in American culture. That being said, I have plenty of friends who share dinner together every night and it really warms my heart to see them teaching their kids how to get along with each other enough to eat dinner together.
I wonder how many conflicts could be avoided if people simply ate meals together. Think about it; what if your coworkers who were fighting behind each other's backs were to sit down to a meal together? It's pretty hard to spit meanness when your mouth is full of food. It doesn't happen naturally of course, but what if we made the effort to eat with people we don't necessarily like? Make a table before my enemies, that sort of thing. It would certainly take humility on both parties sides and there certainly isn't an abundance of that going around from what I can see. But God calls us to reconciliation with one another and with our enemies.
When I was in Amsterdam this past fall, I shared a cup of hot chocolate (and the other three had coffee) with one Dutch girl and two Iranians. Now, to be honest, I thought the Iranians were going to hate me just because I was American. That's about as ridiculous as them thinking I would hate them just because they were Iranian. We had a lovely time, and I think if we would share more meals and drinks with people who are different than us than we'd be a lot better off.
Obviously, this doesn't work all the time, but what if our instincts were to meet with someone over a meal when we had a problem with that person rather than gossip about the person behind their backs? We would probably learn a lot better conflict resolution strategies and just how to interact with our neighbors on a more mature level. When I was in Amsterdam the first time, back in 2007 for the summer, there was a girl who showed me a lot about maturity in relationships. For starters, she came straight to me and asked if I was interested in her as opposed to talking to her friends endlessly about it and never addressing me on the issue. Secondly, it definitely felt awkward as we discussed it and it certainly changed the parameters of the relationship, but it felt good to deal with it in a mature manner. We both didn't think it would be a good idea to pursue anything as we had different plans for our separate futures. A couple years later this same girl confronted me about something else and while I got defensive about it I now realize that she was right and I'm ultimately grateful that she had the guts to confront me on the issue.
How many of us are stuck on an immature level when it comes to how to interact with others? Don't think this applies to you? Are you ever guilty of gossip? Ever guilty of holding a grudge? That second one is one we could learn a lot from kids on. It seems like no matter how upset a child is with me for setting boundaries for them in the classroom one day, the next day they've completely forgotten about it and moved on. How many adults are like that? How many people hold grudges for years without reconciling with that person or at the very least forgiving that person in their hearts? While I don't think we're ever called to forgive and forget; we are called to forgive. The reason I don't think we should always forget is that sometimes it would put us in an unnecessarily dangerous situation, like an abuse situation or something. If someone is being abused than they need to seek outside help. Forgetting isn't going to cause the other person to repent of their sins. Sin carries consequences, and sometimes those consequences need to be jail time. God forgives all sin, but that doesn't mean there aren't consequences to be paid for previous sins.
I realize this probably comes across as naive and unrealistic. But with that being said, I bet meals or drinks together could solve a lot more problems than we realize. It's not just about the meal, it's about the communication that takes place during the meal. It's about mutual understanding and sincerely trying to see where the other person is coming from. So the next time you're tempted to gossip about someone behind their backs, try meeting them for a meal instead and confront the issue with that person. We might just be surprised at the results.
When I helped my current pastor with his youth ministry at another church, one thing that always struck me as tragic was that the thing the kids loved the most was when we did big meals together. Now, it wasn't tragic that they loved the meals together, it was the reason behind it. Almost all of them said they rarely ate meals as a family, usually this was reserved for Thanksgiving and Christmas if that. That really stuck out to me, as I had always thought that's just what you do for dinner, you sit down as a family and enjoy one another's company. But apparently, this is practiced less and less often as time progresses in American culture. That being said, I have plenty of friends who share dinner together every night and it really warms my heart to see them teaching their kids how to get along with each other enough to eat dinner together.
I wonder how many conflicts could be avoided if people simply ate meals together. Think about it; what if your coworkers who were fighting behind each other's backs were to sit down to a meal together? It's pretty hard to spit meanness when your mouth is full of food. It doesn't happen naturally of course, but what if we made the effort to eat with people we don't necessarily like? Make a table before my enemies, that sort of thing. It would certainly take humility on both parties sides and there certainly isn't an abundance of that going around from what I can see. But God calls us to reconciliation with one another and with our enemies.
When I was in Amsterdam this past fall, I shared a cup of hot chocolate (and the other three had coffee) with one Dutch girl and two Iranians. Now, to be honest, I thought the Iranians were going to hate me just because I was American. That's about as ridiculous as them thinking I would hate them just because they were Iranian. We had a lovely time, and I think if we would share more meals and drinks with people who are different than us than we'd be a lot better off.
Obviously, this doesn't work all the time, but what if our instincts were to meet with someone over a meal when we had a problem with that person rather than gossip about the person behind their backs? We would probably learn a lot better conflict resolution strategies and just how to interact with our neighbors on a more mature level. When I was in Amsterdam the first time, back in 2007 for the summer, there was a girl who showed me a lot about maturity in relationships. For starters, she came straight to me and asked if I was interested in her as opposed to talking to her friends endlessly about it and never addressing me on the issue. Secondly, it definitely felt awkward as we discussed it and it certainly changed the parameters of the relationship, but it felt good to deal with it in a mature manner. We both didn't think it would be a good idea to pursue anything as we had different plans for our separate futures. A couple years later this same girl confronted me about something else and while I got defensive about it I now realize that she was right and I'm ultimately grateful that she had the guts to confront me on the issue.
How many of us are stuck on an immature level when it comes to how to interact with others? Don't think this applies to you? Are you ever guilty of gossip? Ever guilty of holding a grudge? That second one is one we could learn a lot from kids on. It seems like no matter how upset a child is with me for setting boundaries for them in the classroom one day, the next day they've completely forgotten about it and moved on. How many adults are like that? How many people hold grudges for years without reconciling with that person or at the very least forgiving that person in their hearts? While I don't think we're ever called to forgive and forget; we are called to forgive. The reason I don't think we should always forget is that sometimes it would put us in an unnecessarily dangerous situation, like an abuse situation or something. If someone is being abused than they need to seek outside help. Forgetting isn't going to cause the other person to repent of their sins. Sin carries consequences, and sometimes those consequences need to be jail time. God forgives all sin, but that doesn't mean there aren't consequences to be paid for previous sins.
I realize this probably comes across as naive and unrealistic. But with that being said, I bet meals or drinks together could solve a lot more problems than we realize. It's not just about the meal, it's about the communication that takes place during the meal. It's about mutual understanding and sincerely trying to see where the other person is coming from. So the next time you're tempted to gossip about someone behind their backs, try meeting them for a meal instead and confront the issue with that person. We might just be surprised at the results.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
mealtime
Over the past month since I've been home, I have had the immense pleasure of eating with friends again. When you're overseas it's nice sometimes to eat with people you don't know and try to make new friends; but there is something almost magical about eating with good friends whom you have a history with. In my humble opinion, there's really nothing much better than eating some good food and reminiscing or creating new memories with great friends. Since I've moved down to Florida, I have been extremely blessed to have been introduced to several friends who I would consider to be life-long friends at this point. Maybe life will interrupt us and some of them or I will move away, but I sincerely think they'll be the types of friends who I will stay in touch with or at the very least see at different times and be able to pick up where we left off. This has happened more times than I can count since I've been back from my trip. I was gone for 8 months and in a lot of ways it seems as though nothing's changed between my friends and I. Of course, countless things have taken place in the lives of my friends and within me during that time period, but we're able to pick up exactly where we left off.
Is it too far to say that perhaps there is a spiritual dimension to sharing food with one another? Jesus broke bread and gave it to His disciples instructing them to eat in remembrance of Him. Mealtimes are across every culture and are enjoyed in vastly different ways, but there seems to be something deeply moving during meals that I can't quite put my finger on. I absolutely love eating meals with friends, I get so much joy out of those times.
Lately, I've been trying to be better at planning my weeks in advance to either eat out with friends, eat at their place, or invite them over to my place. This past weekend I had the pleasure of having a young couple over with their 2 year old daughter and finally got to cook for someone else for a change. The spaghetti was a little too spicy for everyone's taste but my own but you live and learn and next time I'll tone down the spice for others. My previous few places I haven't really had a dining room to invite others to eat in but now that I'm living with Debbie she has 2 tables to eat at and told me that I can invite anyone over anytime.
My friends all call me a mooch which might be true but the main reason I invite myself over for dinner is it's just an excuse to get together and share in each other's presence. Ever since high school I've been a bit of a social butterfly. That has calmed down quite a bit but if you want to see me enjoying myself come alongside me during a meal with my friends and you'll see me at my happiest. Thankfully, my friends are really accommodating and usually don't cook beef or pork when I'm over since I try not to eat those meats too often.
I have shared meals with people all over the world, and nothing beats sharing it with friends. Couchsurfers hold a special place in my heart, but even they don't compare to friends whom you have a history with. Couchsurfers are usually instantaneously friends but they lack a history that I have with my friends that I've had for a while. Maybe there could be a way that I could introduce more of my friends to couchsurfers and vice versa; get some of the fear out of the way. What if we all shared a meal together? Food has a way of breaking down barriers between people; it's hard to be angry or put off with someone if you're both enjoying delicious, flavorful food.
Well, it's dinner time so I need to call someone and share a meal with them. Bye for now.
Is it too far to say that perhaps there is a spiritual dimension to sharing food with one another? Jesus broke bread and gave it to His disciples instructing them to eat in remembrance of Him. Mealtimes are across every culture and are enjoyed in vastly different ways, but there seems to be something deeply moving during meals that I can't quite put my finger on. I absolutely love eating meals with friends, I get so much joy out of those times.
Lately, I've been trying to be better at planning my weeks in advance to either eat out with friends, eat at their place, or invite them over to my place. This past weekend I had the pleasure of having a young couple over with their 2 year old daughter and finally got to cook for someone else for a change. The spaghetti was a little too spicy for everyone's taste but my own but you live and learn and next time I'll tone down the spice for others. My previous few places I haven't really had a dining room to invite others to eat in but now that I'm living with Debbie she has 2 tables to eat at and told me that I can invite anyone over anytime.
My friends all call me a mooch which might be true but the main reason I invite myself over for dinner is it's just an excuse to get together and share in each other's presence. Ever since high school I've been a bit of a social butterfly. That has calmed down quite a bit but if you want to see me enjoying myself come alongside me during a meal with my friends and you'll see me at my happiest. Thankfully, my friends are really accommodating and usually don't cook beef or pork when I'm over since I try not to eat those meats too often.
I have shared meals with people all over the world, and nothing beats sharing it with friends. Couchsurfers hold a special place in my heart, but even they don't compare to friends whom you have a history with. Couchsurfers are usually instantaneously friends but they lack a history that I have with my friends that I've had for a while. Maybe there could be a way that I could introduce more of my friends to couchsurfers and vice versa; get some of the fear out of the way. What if we all shared a meal together? Food has a way of breaking down barriers between people; it's hard to be angry or put off with someone if you're both enjoying delicious, flavorful food.
Well, it's dinner time so I need to call someone and share a meal with them. Bye for now.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
ministry and working, or the lack thereof
Yesterday I tutored at my old school for the first time in a week and was really happy to make a little bit of income. Unfortunately, that's only been about once a week so it's not nearly enough income to live off of. I've been checking craigslist often for jobs within the education sector but have been coming up empty-handed. Yesterday, I was going to go apply in person to different restaurants around me until I got called into tutoring. I plan on trying that again today, but honestly hope I'll be called into tutoring as I make pretty good money at that when I do it. For the summer, though, I'm going to have to find something to do with my time. I'd love to go overseas again but simply don't have the necessary funds to do so.
At this point, you may be asking yourself, so, what does he do with all his time? Good question. For a few hours 3-4 days a week I help my pastor with church-related stuff, just getting stuff done that needs to be done. I enjoy helping him immensely. For several years he was a youth pastor and I was his right-hand man so this reminds me of those times when I can be on the 'front lines' of ministry with our church. I love doing church work, it's a big part of my life. My pastor suggested that I start fund-raising for the work I'm doing and so this week I'm going to start doing that if I can get some information from him about how to best go about it (you've been forewarned :) He has another friend who said he would try and fundraise for me as well so hopefully he comes through as that would also be a huge help. My main concern in this is just going to be making it as easy as possible to donate. I know I'm a lot more likely to donate to a missionary if there's a clear path on how to do so. This past Sunday we had a meeting of several people who want to present opportunities to the rest of our church of service things they can do. My main goal in the area of service is to get people to see it as a lifestyle and not just something you do on one Saturday a month or on mission trips. That will take quite a bit of work to change people's perception but I think I'm up to the challenge. As Christians, we are called to serve because Christ served while He was on this earth and set the example of how we're to strive to live. We won't be as good at it as He was obviously but I'd rather try than not.
On a podcast the other day, I heard a guy give a stat that a large percentage of jobs are never even posted. How do I go about getting those jobs? That's why I'm going to go to restaurants today or sometime this week and apply in person and ask to speak to a hiring manager. I remember my dad giving me that advice when I first moved down to Sarasota and it worked then. Hopefully it will work now as well, although the economy is still in the dumps. I've been praying a lot for a job. The hard part is realizing I'm going to have to take a pay cut from what I'm used to, which is pretty hard to swallow. After receiving a certain salary you start to feel entitled to it instead of being grateful that you're paid well enough to make it and also put some away in savings should you choose to. This may sound weird, but I can't wait to start saving money again. I almost look at it as a game of how much I can save and how little I can live on.
The other nice part about having an income is being able to give generously. I love giving to missions and my church. I love supporting the work of the kingdom and seeing people reveal Christ to different parts of the world. Missionaries don't ever 'bring' Christ to other places, they simply reveal that He's already there in their midst. It's really cool that I get to be a part of that. As any missionary will tell you, if you support them whether through prayer or finances it's a huge blessing to them and the only reason they're able to do what they do. Of course, as a friend just mentioned on her blog, if you're a Christian, you're a missionary. No matter where we find ourselves, we are to proclaim the gospel, both in word and deed. St. Francis said to preach the word of God everyday, if necessary use words. I heard a speaker at a youth conference a few years ago preach about this and he said that we would of course need to use words, we need to open our mouths. Who is in our worlds that we can impact for Christ? And we don't have to shove it down people's throats either, but people should at least know that we are Christians so if they have any questions we're ready to answer, in season or out of season. Sometimes the best answer is "I don't know" because at least you're being honest at that point.
In youth group we often saw kids bring their friends to church. There's nothing wrong with that but at the same time they needed to realize (and my youth pastor was good about telling them this) that they themselves were the primary missionaries called by God to impact their friends' lives. A lot of people, whether in youth group or as an adult even, just try to get people to go to church with them. Again, this is fine sometimes, but a lot of times it's nothing more than a cop out to have someone else share the gospel with their friends when they're the ones who should be the primary sharers of the Word. We are called to meet together as Christians but we're also called to be sent out into the world, not just stay in a church building and expect the culture around us to come to us. I am guilty of this oftentimes. Of just playing it safe and having my Christian friends and never reaching out to people in the culture around me. It requires getting out of one's comfort zone; which is hard to do because it's exactly that, comfortable. How can we impact the world around us though if we stay in our comfort zones? Light is best used in darkness.
May we become people who ask God and echo Isaiah, "Here am I, send me."
At this point, you may be asking yourself, so, what does he do with all his time? Good question. For a few hours 3-4 days a week I help my pastor with church-related stuff, just getting stuff done that needs to be done. I enjoy helping him immensely. For several years he was a youth pastor and I was his right-hand man so this reminds me of those times when I can be on the 'front lines' of ministry with our church. I love doing church work, it's a big part of my life. My pastor suggested that I start fund-raising for the work I'm doing and so this week I'm going to start doing that if I can get some information from him about how to best go about it (you've been forewarned :) He has another friend who said he would try and fundraise for me as well so hopefully he comes through as that would also be a huge help. My main concern in this is just going to be making it as easy as possible to donate. I know I'm a lot more likely to donate to a missionary if there's a clear path on how to do so. This past Sunday we had a meeting of several people who want to present opportunities to the rest of our church of service things they can do. My main goal in the area of service is to get people to see it as a lifestyle and not just something you do on one Saturday a month or on mission trips. That will take quite a bit of work to change people's perception but I think I'm up to the challenge. As Christians, we are called to serve because Christ served while He was on this earth and set the example of how we're to strive to live. We won't be as good at it as He was obviously but I'd rather try than not.
On a podcast the other day, I heard a guy give a stat that a large percentage of jobs are never even posted. How do I go about getting those jobs? That's why I'm going to go to restaurants today or sometime this week and apply in person and ask to speak to a hiring manager. I remember my dad giving me that advice when I first moved down to Sarasota and it worked then. Hopefully it will work now as well, although the economy is still in the dumps. I've been praying a lot for a job. The hard part is realizing I'm going to have to take a pay cut from what I'm used to, which is pretty hard to swallow. After receiving a certain salary you start to feel entitled to it instead of being grateful that you're paid well enough to make it and also put some away in savings should you choose to. This may sound weird, but I can't wait to start saving money again. I almost look at it as a game of how much I can save and how little I can live on.
The other nice part about having an income is being able to give generously. I love giving to missions and my church. I love supporting the work of the kingdom and seeing people reveal Christ to different parts of the world. Missionaries don't ever 'bring' Christ to other places, they simply reveal that He's already there in their midst. It's really cool that I get to be a part of that. As any missionary will tell you, if you support them whether through prayer or finances it's a huge blessing to them and the only reason they're able to do what they do. Of course, as a friend just mentioned on her blog, if you're a Christian, you're a missionary. No matter where we find ourselves, we are to proclaim the gospel, both in word and deed. St. Francis said to preach the word of God everyday, if necessary use words. I heard a speaker at a youth conference a few years ago preach about this and he said that we would of course need to use words, we need to open our mouths. Who is in our worlds that we can impact for Christ? And we don't have to shove it down people's throats either, but people should at least know that we are Christians so if they have any questions we're ready to answer, in season or out of season. Sometimes the best answer is "I don't know" because at least you're being honest at that point.
In youth group we often saw kids bring their friends to church. There's nothing wrong with that but at the same time they needed to realize (and my youth pastor was good about telling them this) that they themselves were the primary missionaries called by God to impact their friends' lives. A lot of people, whether in youth group or as an adult even, just try to get people to go to church with them. Again, this is fine sometimes, but a lot of times it's nothing more than a cop out to have someone else share the gospel with their friends when they're the ones who should be the primary sharers of the Word. We are called to meet together as Christians but we're also called to be sent out into the world, not just stay in a church building and expect the culture around us to come to us. I am guilty of this oftentimes. Of just playing it safe and having my Christian friends and never reaching out to people in the culture around me. It requires getting out of one's comfort zone; which is hard to do because it's exactly that, comfortable. How can we impact the world around us though if we stay in our comfort zones? Light is best used in darkness.
May we become people who ask God and echo Isaiah, "Here am I, send me."
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Wedding Bells
Today marked the day that my friends Curtis and Brice were united in holy matrimony. Another one bites the dust, as my friend Jason said afterwards. It was a great ceremony with a lot of my friends from church there and enjoying themselves. Part of me wanted to text Curtis this morning to tell him there was still time to back out of it. I decided though that I didn't want to ruin his special day. With that being said, today marks the beginning of the end of the rest of his life. For some odd reason, I would really like to see a wedding where one of the people decides to not show up on the big day. Perhaps that's immaturity speaking, I don't know.
On the other hand, a lot of people just expect that young people will eventually get married. Why is that the case? On top of that, there has been a recent backlash in society as a whole but especially in Christian circles against 'extended adolescence' particularly in regards to males. Some of this is justified but a lot of it's not. Mark Driscoll goes so far as to say it's a crisis. A crisis? Really? The fact that people are getting married later and later is a crisis? Let's not be melodramatic or anything Mr. Driscoll. Another friend of mine posted a link to a blog that said something along the same lines of how young men needed to marry and have a family. I couldn't disagree more with that statement. I commented on his post that it was a good thing that Jesus and Paul didn't live according to the normality of their day, otherwise we wouldn't have the entire new testament. He gave some response about how they were productive and that was really the point. If that was the point than why didn't the author just say young men need to be productive? Personally, I see nothing wrong with just staying single. Many of the saints throughout Christian history were single and they did amazing things for God. Paul even says he wishes that everyone could stay single in his letters. He also says it's not God speaking but Paul when he says that but I would dare say Paul is a pretty smart guy to listen to as himself if he wrote over half the new testament letters and instructed the new churches on how to be churches when he was among them.
Maybe I'll get married someday, but maybe I won't; and I'm perfectly fine with the idea of being single the rest of my life. At the wedding I sat next to my friend Jason and his family and his daughter Izzy put her head on my lap to snuggle. My other friend Mark commented something along the lines of, "And you can say 'no' to that?" referring to me saying no to having kids. Of course I can say no to that! I've said no for as long as I can remember. Things change of course sometimes but I have had absolutely no problem with saying no to having kids thus far and don't see that as being problematic for me in the future. I have plenty of kids to worry about as a teacher that I don't need to add more to the mix. I love my friends' kids to pieces, but part of that is that I get to hand the kids back to my friends when I'm finished with them. I can't imagine if I was responsible for them 24 hours a day. I can barely keep track of myself much less a little person who relies on me for everything.
While I was in South Africa I fell for a woman who I stayed with for a week down there. It was shortly after the time where I had decided I was open to the idea of a relationship again; which hadn't been the case in about 6 years really. Looking back, I think the real reason I was actually open to the idea of a relationship again was just solely out of being lonely from traveling alone. Now that I'm back surrounded by friends I don't really have that desire for another person again. Obviously, certain girls still catch my fancy but it's not like I just have to go after them in order to pursue happiness. I'm perfectly happy on my own. Anyways, this girl commented how being single really gives us the opportunity to serve God more whole-heartedly. Why don't more of us take advantage of this fact? How many single people do I know who pine away wishing they were with someone while the whole time they have more free time that can be used to serve others? Take advantage of your singleness, people! I realize that the majority of people who read this are already married but if you are still single take full advantage of your singleness and serve the Lord with the extra free time you have right now. When you're married your thoughts turn to how you can please your wife so take advantage of this singleness period instead of wishing you were married.
More importantly, single or married, we should strive for contentedness. Both singles and married couples struggle with this from what I can see. Part of the problem with wealth is that it gives us so many options that we are paralyzed about what to do next. Barry Schwartz wrote a book titled "The Paradox of Choice" that deals with this phenomenon. Not only does wealth give us too many options, but being surrounded by people who have more than ourselves makes us want to strive for more and more wealth instead of being happy where you are. Sometimes people need to legitimately make more income but a lot of times it's simply to acquire more and more stuff that you don't really need that you then need to take care of and maintain. When money loses its grip on our lives, we are freer to serve God and others more whole-heartedly. May we all learn to live with contentment in God, whether we are single or married.
On the other hand, a lot of people just expect that young people will eventually get married. Why is that the case? On top of that, there has been a recent backlash in society as a whole but especially in Christian circles against 'extended adolescence' particularly in regards to males. Some of this is justified but a lot of it's not. Mark Driscoll goes so far as to say it's a crisis. A crisis? Really? The fact that people are getting married later and later is a crisis? Let's not be melodramatic or anything Mr. Driscoll. Another friend of mine posted a link to a blog that said something along the same lines of how young men needed to marry and have a family. I couldn't disagree more with that statement. I commented on his post that it was a good thing that Jesus and Paul didn't live according to the normality of their day, otherwise we wouldn't have the entire new testament. He gave some response about how they were productive and that was really the point. If that was the point than why didn't the author just say young men need to be productive? Personally, I see nothing wrong with just staying single. Many of the saints throughout Christian history were single and they did amazing things for God. Paul even says he wishes that everyone could stay single in his letters. He also says it's not God speaking but Paul when he says that but I would dare say Paul is a pretty smart guy to listen to as himself if he wrote over half the new testament letters and instructed the new churches on how to be churches when he was among them.
Maybe I'll get married someday, but maybe I won't; and I'm perfectly fine with the idea of being single the rest of my life. At the wedding I sat next to my friend Jason and his family and his daughter Izzy put her head on my lap to snuggle. My other friend Mark commented something along the lines of, "And you can say 'no' to that?" referring to me saying no to having kids. Of course I can say no to that! I've said no for as long as I can remember. Things change of course sometimes but I have had absolutely no problem with saying no to having kids thus far and don't see that as being problematic for me in the future. I have plenty of kids to worry about as a teacher that I don't need to add more to the mix. I love my friends' kids to pieces, but part of that is that I get to hand the kids back to my friends when I'm finished with them. I can't imagine if I was responsible for them 24 hours a day. I can barely keep track of myself much less a little person who relies on me for everything.
While I was in South Africa I fell for a woman who I stayed with for a week down there. It was shortly after the time where I had decided I was open to the idea of a relationship again; which hadn't been the case in about 6 years really. Looking back, I think the real reason I was actually open to the idea of a relationship again was just solely out of being lonely from traveling alone. Now that I'm back surrounded by friends I don't really have that desire for another person again. Obviously, certain girls still catch my fancy but it's not like I just have to go after them in order to pursue happiness. I'm perfectly happy on my own. Anyways, this girl commented how being single really gives us the opportunity to serve God more whole-heartedly. Why don't more of us take advantage of this fact? How many single people do I know who pine away wishing they were with someone while the whole time they have more free time that can be used to serve others? Take advantage of your singleness, people! I realize that the majority of people who read this are already married but if you are still single take full advantage of your singleness and serve the Lord with the extra free time you have right now. When you're married your thoughts turn to how you can please your wife so take advantage of this singleness period instead of wishing you were married.
More importantly, single or married, we should strive for contentedness. Both singles and married couples struggle with this from what I can see. Part of the problem with wealth is that it gives us so many options that we are paralyzed about what to do next. Barry Schwartz wrote a book titled "The Paradox of Choice" that deals with this phenomenon. Not only does wealth give us too many options, but being surrounded by people who have more than ourselves makes us want to strive for more and more wealth instead of being happy where you are. Sometimes people need to legitimately make more income but a lot of times it's simply to acquire more and more stuff that you don't really need that you then need to take care of and maintain. When money loses its grip on our lives, we are freer to serve God and others more whole-heartedly. May we all learn to live with contentment in God, whether we are single or married.
El Sol
About 6.5 years ago I moved down to Florida for a few reasons. One of the main ones was that I wanted to get out of the midwest with it's lack of sunlight during the winter and get somewhere sunny and warm. My two choices were Phoenix or Sarasota; Phoenix because I had been there already a few times and loved it and Sarasota because I had already spent a summer down there and knew Brandon, who would become my first roommate out of college.
When you struggle with depression, you really need all the help you can get. So I decided it was time to chase after some sun. That's exactly what I got from moving to Florida. Now I just have to be careful that I don't get too much of it and that I wear a good amount of sunscreen whenever I'm out in it. It seems like I get sunburned very easily; I always have, now I'm just more aware of it with all the campaigns against skin cancer I've seen, particularly in Australia. Even with the sun though, I managed to get into a spell of depression sometime ago, before I left on my trip. Now I have to make a concious effort to get sunlight on a regular, ideally daily basis.
There are several things that can help with depression, sunlight is just one of them. I read a book titled "The Depression Cure" last year and it had some great advice. There were 6 main things that it said to do to fight depression. They were to get some sunlight everyday (if you don't have access to the sun than get a light box) exercise cardiovascularly 3 times a week, disrupt negative thinking, take fish oil, have a strong social support network, and make sure you're getting the right amount of sleep, not too much and not too little. Keeping track of all 6 can be difficult until you make them into habits. I usually do pretty well on all of them except the sunlight exposure and exercise ones. I forget sometimes to get out in the sun and sometimes I just can't because of working so I plan on trying to get my insurance to pay for a light box in the fall. Also, I go through stages with the exercise thing it seems like. Sometimes I'm all about it and other times I couldn't care less even though I need to do it. Lately I've been stuck in the latter category.
The sun can also be seen as a spiritual thing. Some people worship the sun. For others, including myself, it can be symbolic of how Christ illuminates the world and whatever He shines on is brought out of darkness and into light. In Him there is no darkness at all. The sun reminds us that we need to shed light in the dark places of this world, whether they be in our workplaces or on the other side of town.
I moved down to Sarasota 6.5 years ago, and if I ever move again, it will have to be somewhere sunny and warm. I can't get enough of the sun; and I especially can't imagine moving back to cold weather and gray skies at this point in my life. I just spent Easter weekend up near Chicago with my family on my mom's side. I love them all like crazy, but I was reminded of why I don't live up there anymore. It was the middle of April and I had to wear a winter coat because of the cold. Granted, most people were wearing fall-type jackets and seemed fine but when you've been used to mid 80's weather when you drop down to mid 40's it can be quite a shock to your system.
When I go away on vacations, I always come back to other people's vacation destination. I love living here. So, to my fellow Floridians, here's to living in sunny and warm Florida!
When you struggle with depression, you really need all the help you can get. So I decided it was time to chase after some sun. That's exactly what I got from moving to Florida. Now I just have to be careful that I don't get too much of it and that I wear a good amount of sunscreen whenever I'm out in it. It seems like I get sunburned very easily; I always have, now I'm just more aware of it with all the campaigns against skin cancer I've seen, particularly in Australia. Even with the sun though, I managed to get into a spell of depression sometime ago, before I left on my trip. Now I have to make a concious effort to get sunlight on a regular, ideally daily basis.
There are several things that can help with depression, sunlight is just one of them. I read a book titled "The Depression Cure" last year and it had some great advice. There were 6 main things that it said to do to fight depression. They were to get some sunlight everyday (if you don't have access to the sun than get a light box) exercise cardiovascularly 3 times a week, disrupt negative thinking, take fish oil, have a strong social support network, and make sure you're getting the right amount of sleep, not too much and not too little. Keeping track of all 6 can be difficult until you make them into habits. I usually do pretty well on all of them except the sunlight exposure and exercise ones. I forget sometimes to get out in the sun and sometimes I just can't because of working so I plan on trying to get my insurance to pay for a light box in the fall. Also, I go through stages with the exercise thing it seems like. Sometimes I'm all about it and other times I couldn't care less even though I need to do it. Lately I've been stuck in the latter category.
The sun can also be seen as a spiritual thing. Some people worship the sun. For others, including myself, it can be symbolic of how Christ illuminates the world and whatever He shines on is brought out of darkness and into light. In Him there is no darkness at all. The sun reminds us that we need to shed light in the dark places of this world, whether they be in our workplaces or on the other side of town.
I moved down to Sarasota 6.5 years ago, and if I ever move again, it will have to be somewhere sunny and warm. I can't get enough of the sun; and I especially can't imagine moving back to cold weather and gray skies at this point in my life. I just spent Easter weekend up near Chicago with my family on my mom's side. I love them all like crazy, but I was reminded of why I don't live up there anymore. It was the middle of April and I had to wear a winter coat because of the cold. Granted, most people were wearing fall-type jackets and seemed fine but when you've been used to mid 80's weather when you drop down to mid 40's it can be quite a shock to your system.
When I go away on vacations, I always come back to other people's vacation destination. I love living here. So, to my fellow Floridians, here's to living in sunny and warm Florida!
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Growing older and exercising
For the first time in my adult life I wanted to be older last night. I went to watch my friends play soccer in an over 30 league and asked if I could play even though I was only 29. "Sorry, we're pretty strict on that." Ah man, I wanna play too!
A couple weeks ago I went to a retirement home to try and set up some times for students in our youth group to volunteer as well as times for adults to volunteer. I've never been comfortable around old people as a general rule, except of course my grandparents. I remember thinking to myself, "So this is what death looks/feels like." Even after having been given a tour, I still felt uncomfortable while there. For whatever reason, I've always loved being around kids. Probably because they're full of life and energy. Life takes it's toll though, and you grow old and get stuck in a retirement home, where I can't imagine anyone really wants to spend their last days. Obviously, the retirement homes do their best to create a good atmosphere but everyone loves to be surrounded by family, whether by blood or by constant interaction and just doing life together.
One of the good things that comes with growing older is that you gain wisdom. This isn't necessarily true but is the case more often than not I think. That's why I wish I was more comfortable around older people, so I could gain more wisdom from them. My grandma is one of the wisest people I know and always shares a nugget or two of wisdom; for which I am always grateful. They've been through a lot in their lives and are able to take difficult things in stride better than younger people.
While I was in New Zealand, I attended an Ironman competition. Well, I attended parts of it. It was pouring down rain that day, I felt bad for the triathletes as I went back to my couchsurfer's house to dry off and come out again towards the end of the day. The winner was really inspiring to me; he was 38 and finished on top for the 10th time in his career. How impressive is that?! He was 38 and at the top of his game. I remember reading somewhere that 25 is the peak of an adult male's physical condition in terms of muscle mass and just health in general. I'm past that now but I take great comfort in the fact that a lot of triathletes are in their 30's and are still in great shape. I used to work with a guy who was in his 60's when he completed an Ironman. Physical condition does have something to do with age and metabolic rates, but maybe it's more dependent on diet and exercise than anything else.
That's something I need to get more into again, is exercising. When I was traveling it was too easy, I'd just walk everywhere everyday since I didn't have a car for 7 out of the 8 months I was gone. Now I have a car and am finding it difficult to want to ever go to the gym and workout. It just seems like it takes a really long time to build up a solid base. A good friend and I want to do a triathlon in October so I need to start training for that. It's good to have a goal to work towards for me, otherwise I have no motivation. The only problem is that the triathlon isn't until October so it makes me feel like I have plenty of time to just relax until I need to start training. This triathlon is only a sprint, but should be well worth it. I've only ever competed in sprints, I'd like to do an Ironman but I think that might be just too much on a body. Most people I know who have run even just one marathon have problems with their knees or other parts of their legs. That just doesn't hold a lot of appeal to me. A half-marathon might be alright though. A full one might just be too long and too much stress on your joints. In an Ironman competition you run a marathon after swimming 2.4 miles and then biking 112 miles; talk about a workout!
A couple weeks ago I went to a retirement home to try and set up some times for students in our youth group to volunteer as well as times for adults to volunteer. I've never been comfortable around old people as a general rule, except of course my grandparents. I remember thinking to myself, "So this is what death looks/feels like." Even after having been given a tour, I still felt uncomfortable while there. For whatever reason, I've always loved being around kids. Probably because they're full of life and energy. Life takes it's toll though, and you grow old and get stuck in a retirement home, where I can't imagine anyone really wants to spend their last days. Obviously, the retirement homes do their best to create a good atmosphere but everyone loves to be surrounded by family, whether by blood or by constant interaction and just doing life together.
One of the good things that comes with growing older is that you gain wisdom. This isn't necessarily true but is the case more often than not I think. That's why I wish I was more comfortable around older people, so I could gain more wisdom from them. My grandma is one of the wisest people I know and always shares a nugget or two of wisdom; for which I am always grateful. They've been through a lot in their lives and are able to take difficult things in stride better than younger people.
While I was in New Zealand, I attended an Ironman competition. Well, I attended parts of it. It was pouring down rain that day, I felt bad for the triathletes as I went back to my couchsurfer's house to dry off and come out again towards the end of the day. The winner was really inspiring to me; he was 38 and finished on top for the 10th time in his career. How impressive is that?! He was 38 and at the top of his game. I remember reading somewhere that 25 is the peak of an adult male's physical condition in terms of muscle mass and just health in general. I'm past that now but I take great comfort in the fact that a lot of triathletes are in their 30's and are still in great shape. I used to work with a guy who was in his 60's when he completed an Ironman. Physical condition does have something to do with age and metabolic rates, but maybe it's more dependent on diet and exercise than anything else.
That's something I need to get more into again, is exercising. When I was traveling it was too easy, I'd just walk everywhere everyday since I didn't have a car for 7 out of the 8 months I was gone. Now I have a car and am finding it difficult to want to ever go to the gym and workout. It just seems like it takes a really long time to build up a solid base. A good friend and I want to do a triathlon in October so I need to start training for that. It's good to have a goal to work towards for me, otherwise I have no motivation. The only problem is that the triathlon isn't until October so it makes me feel like I have plenty of time to just relax until I need to start training. This triathlon is only a sprint, but should be well worth it. I've only ever competed in sprints, I'd like to do an Ironman but I think that might be just too much on a body. Most people I know who have run even just one marathon have problems with their knees or other parts of their legs. That just doesn't hold a lot of appeal to me. A half-marathon might be alright though. A full one might just be too long and too much stress on your joints. In an Ironman competition you run a marathon after swimming 2.4 miles and then biking 112 miles; talk about a workout!
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