Standing on Shoulders

A week or two ago my wife and I were watching our new favorite show titled ‘This is Us.’  This show is way out of my norm in terms of tv shows or movies.  I usually prefer stupid humor types of movies or over the top action movies.

The most recent episode we watched was one in where a 36 year old’s biological father is in a hospital bed and passes away after a long battle with stomach cancer.

I don’t mean to rat myself out as an emotional man, but almost every episode of this show has left me with a tear in my eye.  This episode though, was altogether different.  It instantly transported me back to Paris in 2010.  Allow me to explain.

I was in the middle of a round the world trip when I was 28 years old.  I was staying at a couchsurfer’s house on the outskirts of Paris when my mom called.  My grandpa was sick and in a hospital bed.  He told me “I love you, Justin.”  My mom got back on and told me he might end up turning a corner soon, they weren’t really sure at this point.

For some reason I just knew though, I could hear it in his voice.  I could hear he was going to pass soon.  And so, I wept.  I wept in a complete stranger’s home on the outskirts of Paris in the middle of the night.  I wept for what felt like forever and slept for even longer the next day.

Then we watch a tv episode years later and I’m suddenly transported back to the random Parisian’s home, memories come flooding back and before I can stop myself I’m weeping again.  And not one of those barely crying, man sniffles.  No, I don’t really do those.  When I cried this last time, I wept.

I wept for a man who left a hole when he left.  In my humble opinion, when some people pass they just leave a bigger hole in this world.  They make a tremendous impact on most everyone they meet.  My grandpa was one of those men.

As I get older I seem to become more acutely aware that everything I am and everything I have done and will do in the future is not isolated.  My life has been shaped by outside forces and influences.  First of all by Christ Himself, and secondly by loved ones who poured so much life into me.