New Beginnings, New Identity, Part 1

Wrote this on January 5th, sorry for the delay!

As of December 31^st, 2014, I am a married man.  I married the woman of my dreams, Steffani Taylor (now Hemming.)  I’m still getting used to wearing the wedding ring.  It’s a bit weird and reminds me of when I first started wearing glasses.  At first, it just feels weird to have something on your body at all times that wasn’t there before (minus sleeping for the glasses.)  I look down at it often and am reminded that I have now taken on a new identity.

For roughly a decade since college I was single.  I’d go on a few dates here and there, but no real relationship to speak of.  I was happy about it for the most part.  There were bouts of loneliness to be sure, but overall I was happy being single and free.  I did a ton of traveling, had a good job with good benefits and had great family and friends.  Although I will add that I was miserable at my teaching job on and off for the last few years in particular.

Many of my single friends, especially females as one might imagine, were a bit preoccupied with the desire for a relationship.  Oftentimes I’d pray for God to take away the desire for a relationship.  He listened to my Grandma and Steffani and others rather than my own selfish prayers.

During the last half of November and early part of December prior to coming back to the states, I went through a series of what might be called identity crises or existential crises.  If you’re single for a long period of time you start to identify as single.  I traveled around the world on a solo trip for 8 months.  Starting in 2006 I went to different countries every chance I could get.  I spent a lot of time alone; both at home and abroad.

When we were leaving Myanmar, it occurred to me that I had spent roughly a third of the past 4 years living out of a large suitcase (or large backpack) and a backpack.  2 bags were essentially all I owned.  Yes, I had stuff back at my parents’ house in Illinois, but as far as what I had with me it was a big bag and backpack.  It symbolized freedom to me.  All I had to worry about was contained in those 2 bags.

Ever since I graduated college I’ve been somewhat of a minimalist.  Freedom is found in simplicity if you ask me.  It will definitely be an adjustment to own more stuff.  Thankfully Steffani and I are renting a really small apartment in Ft. Myers so we truly won’t have room for a lot of stuff.  When we flew home from Springfield to Ft. Myers in December I sent down 4 bags worth of stuff. 

There are more things in my closet but I really want to take the time to sort through things and get rid of just about everything.  It just takes a certain amount of time to sort through everything.  I have a ridiculous amount of baseball cards that I just need to admit are probably never going to come back in value like they did in the late ‘80’s/early 90’s when they were all the craze.